Chicago's feces: A stench to be reckoned with
What is it about Chicago and feces? Dave Matthews Band’s bus manager and now Vandale Amos Willis—apparently if you give lots of money or apologize for flinging poo, then it’s okay(?).
The Associated Press published a story about a Chicago man in a Duluth, Minn. court who was reported as apologizing for “spreading his feces around a courtroom during his trial on drug charges.”
This really warrants a couple of questions, like, was he on drugs or selling? Because being on drugs can slightly explain what he was doing smearing his own poo all around—or if he was selling, who was desperate enough to buy drugs from Mr. Poo-hands? Okay, that’s a little ridiculous, I know, but isn’t spreading your feces a little on the ridiculous side too?
Why is it that Chicago seems to get the brunt of the crap club? Dave Matthew Band’s tour bus, in 2004, I believe, was in trouble for throwing, literally, tons of feces into the Chicago River—Nice. Well Matthews apologized for his employee who did this and then made a donation to a Chicago organization to help clean the river, ect. I'm not sure if the lawsuit was dropped, but I know I didn't hear anything else said about it.
Meanwhile, Willis was sentenced for 10 years—not for his poop in the courtroom, but 10 years for his drug offense. In fact, the judge said that his actions would not be held against him—to that I would have say, “ick!” But hey, he did apologize for poo-flinging, so all is forgiven, right?
I just know that while I lived in Chicago, I also experienced feces in the city--on a train. I even wrote a column about it. I enjoy the windy city, but some things do not make me want to stand too far down wind of Lake Michigan.
The Associated Press published a story about a Chicago man in a Duluth, Minn. court who was reported as apologizing for “spreading his feces around a courtroom during his trial on drug charges.”
This really warrants a couple of questions, like, was he on drugs or selling? Because being on drugs can slightly explain what he was doing smearing his own poo all around—or if he was selling, who was desperate enough to buy drugs from Mr. Poo-hands? Okay, that’s a little ridiculous, I know, but isn’t spreading your feces a little on the ridiculous side too?
Why is it that Chicago seems to get the brunt of the crap club? Dave Matthew Band’s tour bus, in 2004, I believe, was in trouble for throwing, literally, tons of feces into the Chicago River—Nice. Well Matthews apologized for his employee who did this and then made a donation to a Chicago organization to help clean the river, ect. I'm not sure if the lawsuit was dropped, but I know I didn't hear anything else said about it.
Meanwhile, Willis was sentenced for 10 years—not for his poop in the courtroom, but 10 years for his drug offense. In fact, the judge said that his actions would not be held against him—to that I would have say, “ick!” But hey, he did apologize for poo-flinging, so all is forgiven, right?
I just know that while I lived in Chicago, I also experienced feces in the city--on a train. I even wrote a column about it. I enjoy the windy city, but some things do not make me want to stand too far down wind of Lake Michigan.
posted by JJ Korczyk Photography at 3:02 PM
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